Dan talks about deals
All the fast food chains, in some form or another, claim that a few dollars will get you a lot. For $3, you could get any of the following food combos:
-A McDonald’s sausage biscuit, a small premium roast coffee, and some hash browns
-A Wendy’s double stack, value fries and a Frostee
-3 BK single stackers
You get the drift. Or you could buy yourself a round butter crust taste of ass. That’s what we got for our $3 Reggio’s Pizza from German-based supermarket chain Aldi’s, evil step-sister to Trader Joe’s (yes, they’re owned by the same company).
They have no business putting a fresh, round tomato on the cover of this box. And with whom is their “butter crust” famous? Is it necessary to put that in quotation marks on the box? Maybe they should say instead that they have a “diarrhea-inducing crust”. It’s a dinner size pizza. For who? My left big toe?
0.1 out of 10 pizzas (for inviting my gut’s wrath)
|try and clean yourself as much as possible, but that pizza has still tarnished your soul.|
Joshua deals with himself
If I were a wealthy man, I would prefer meatballs and spinach on my pizza made with the greatest crust that I haven’t yet found. However I am not, and that’s why I was at Aldi’s and that’s why we have Reggio’s Butter Crust Pizza.
But let’s back track. If I was wealthy, I would take a meeting with all the other wealthy people and when the issue of raising the gas prices came up I’d look at them and go
then they’d say “well, let’s raise the cost of education!”
well… cause we need more money.
That’s the thing here people. That’s the great metaphor for life that is pizza. I once had a teacher who said “you don’t need the whole pie, just a slice will do”. Yet for some reason we all think we need the whole pie. Tell me this. Do you really enjoy eating a whole pizza by yourself? Wouldn’t it be more preferable to be surrounded by loved ones sharing the pizza that is life?
Of course, what I just learned according to wikipedia is that if you make over 10 billion dollars, you DO get to take it with you in the afterlife.
So, thanks wikipedia.
Reggio’s butter crust was a bit much. The REAL cheese (that every pizza box except Amy’s has been touting) was good and the rest was edible. I wouldn’t want to live off of these pizzas for any length of time, but I’m glad that I tried it once. While the crust wasn’t the tops, at least it was an honorable attempt at making something different crust wise.
I promise you dear readers, when all the pizza blog money comes rolling in, we’ll be feasting on pizza’s together. I also promise you that Reggio’s won’t be one of them.
3 out of 10 hobos that haven’t been murdered by Rick and Larry
|when you eat frozen pizza everyday.... everyday is like a holiday. a horrible horrible never ending holiday.|